Starting with realities

I promised to share my real experiences with you. Here they come.

I'll start with my first contact with failure. This came in my University years. I wasn't leading my class from the primary school through the secondary, but I wasn't lagging behind either. Infact, I somehow stood out in my class. Interesting to also note that I got into the university immediately I left the secondary school. All these combined to give me the confidence that I wasn't dumb.

So you can imagine my shock the first time I failed a course in the university. And though I didn't have to repeat the class, I had to take the course again. It was a whole new feeling for me. I had to attend classes with folks that were a class behind me. Okay, being the 'tough' girl that I am, I braved it and retook that course and passed it. But that looked like the gateway to other courses that I had to retake. Somewhere along the line, I kinda got used to it, it didn't bother me anymore but the big one was yet to come!

That was when I failed a course in my final year and I knew that translated into an extra semester. It shook me real hard. I realized my colleagues were leaving me and going off. I had gotten a lot toughened by this time and by the processes I had gone through that I really didn't 'react' to the situation but stood up to it with the hope that I'll meet up with my colleagues after four months at the National Youth Service program. But a bigger surprise was waiting for me. By some error (not on my part), I had to stay back again for another semester! That made it an extra session! I hadn't, in my wildest dreams, imagined this possible. Okay, so I had to face it. By the time I'm leaving school finally, my colleagues would have just 2months to complete the Youth service scheme. That meant that I was a full year behind them!

It's interesting to read this now. But I tell you, the process wasn't palatable at all. I didn't add that by the time I was taking the second semester extra, I was taking the course with my younger brother who had never at anytime met up with me academically till this time. You can only imagine the psychological effect. It was at this same university time that a lecturer told me I was topping my class. In essence, there was no logical reason for me to have failed at all.

I have taken time to share this with you because I don't know what failure you might have faced. It might not be academically, it might be financially, business wise, family wise (oh, do I have a story here), whatever. Just know that you may fail, but you're not a failure. When you give in to the thought or feeling of being a failure, that's when you've actually failed. I'll like to say this also, when your emotions are pent up at these low times, if you feel like crying, please do, if it's screaming, do it. Just let out the emotions, don't get them piled up. And one day, you'll be encouraging others with your story. Only when you dare and choose to live it out!

Friends are Friends

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

I came across this chorus from the song by Micheal W. Smith. Its' title is actually 'Friends are Friends' and then I got thinking. Who really is a friend? Yeah, friends should really be forever! But before they are forever, what constitutes their friendship?

Is friendship about convenience?
Is it about nice fronts?
Is it about faking realities?
Is it about not just wanting to appear heartless to the other?

Or,

Is it about being ourselves?
Is it about understanding our silences and noises?
Is it about speaking the truth in love?
Is it about . . .

What exactly is friendship about?
Do you choose your friends or are they stuck down your throat? Do you have to continue to stick a person you just aren't connecting with anymore?

I would love responses.

Whispers

Sad, I lost the grphics in this but the message's still clear. Think on this.


A man whispered, "God, speak to me" and a meadowlark sang.

But, the man did not hear.


So the man yelled, "God, speak to me" and the thunder rolled across the sky.

But, the man did not listen.


The man looked around and said, "God let me see you." And a star shined brightly.

But the man did not see.

And, the man shouted, "God show me a miracle." And, a life was born.

But, the man did not notice.
So, the man cried out in despair, "Touch me God, and let me know you are here." Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man. But, the man brushed the butterfly away .

and walked on.
I found this to be a great reminder that God is always around us in the little and simple things that we take for granted ... even in our electronic age.



So I would like to add one more:

The man cried, "God, I need your help!" And an e-mail arrived reaching out with good news and encouragement.

But, the man deleted it and continued crying
Don't miss out on a blessing because it isn't packaged the way that you expect.

My instructions were to send this to people that I wanted God to bless and I picked you. Won't you please pass this to people you want to be blessed.

Have A Happy Day!

How thankful are you?

This isn't originally mine. Someone sent it to me and I want to share it. How well we pass everyday things that remind us how complete we are and how good God is. Add to the list.
NB: The original author is given the credit.

I am Thankful:

FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.

FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED.

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE.

FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME.

FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH..

FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.


FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.

FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.

FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

It's Sunday morning

It's a beautiful Sunday morning. The weather's very fine here. Not sunny and not cloudy, just fine for a nice stroll ruminating on the works of God's hands.

That same serenity drew me to this page. I have to put something up, yeah, sure. What? I'll be back.

How long can you stand?

This picture says something more to me than just a pair of chocks on rocks. It asks me a question; when things don't look the way I want them to, how long can I wait for a complete process? I got talking with a couple of my friends sometime last week and we can to the conclusion that we're in an instant world now. If not, how do we explain instant food, the ATMs, instant pictures, etc? No one wants to go to the banks to queue anymore, food must just get done faster than they naturally should and we don't want to wait again for pictures to go through the camera, film stage, the darkroom, etc.

These things look like making life easier but looking deep into it, we realize that something vital is being taken from our lives everyday. PATIENCE! That's something the average 21st century young person doesn't have. I walk into stores, banks, offices and see the way young people talk at the personell they meet in these places. They just want to have it ASAP! Let's give a thought to the values that are being taken from us with the 'technological advancements' and think of our children and the future generations. WHo'll teach them some of these things if we're losing them ourselves.

I agree that life's been easier but take out the ease, what are we left with? Take time to think today, I hope we won't have robots thinking for us soon.

Just some thoughts.

Changes do occur

I can't believe that I've been gone for over a month without any post. I didnt ever think it could happen but it did. I had to go through some changes that really kept me off the web. I'm not trying to make an excuse here, nah! Infact, I have lost touch with a lot of things online, and a lot of people too!

Now this gets me thinking. How do we adapt to changes in our lives, nations, places of work, families, etc? The elections in Nigeria have just been conducted. A change has occurred. Power is changing hands in 26days and some people are averse to it! There have been a lot of rancour and unnecessary clamour. Come to think of it, why is it so hard to adapt to change? But I think the problem we have is adapting to a change that we think we dont have an immediate benefit from. We want things done our way - selfish aint that? I'll continue on this but I just had to put something new on this page. I'll be back soon.

"SMSes" and Truths

I have a habit of keeping sms that really touch me and I was recently going through some of them again. What struck me as I read those sms again was how true could they be? Some of them came from people I'm not so close to or who I just met once. Let me share some of them with you so you get a picture of what exactly I'm talking about.

Space seems like an empty word, but it's full of Special People Around Caring Endlessly. Thank you for being part of my space.

I do not think much, I do not think often but when I think, I think of you. I don't think anything to think about than you!

Some pictures are kept in the album, others in the haert. Those in the album are thought of when seen, those in the heart will never be forgotten. As long as my heart beats, you're in it.

In my life, I learnt how to love, to smile, to be happy, to be strong, to be faithful, to work hard and to be honest but I can't learn how to stop missing you.

Silence heals, secrets destroy but confessions heal heartache...my greatest confession to you is that... you are a wonderful friend I don't want to lose.

Okay, so I'll stop there. Those are five of my most treasured sms I posted for the world to see! However, as much as I may not wan tto doubt the heart behind them, I still find myself wondering, how much of the truth we tell ourselves in sms. Do you say something electronically and actually mean something less? As much as I'm for brightening up others' days, I'm also for sincerity. How much it'll hurt me to discover that these messages were just picked up from the net or elsewhere and just sent to momentarily make me feel good.

A word: Before you send that sms, check and be sure you're not giving someone false hopes.

Sayings

These are some sayings about children. Spare a thought for each. Deep thought.

'You cannot teach a child to take care of himself unless you will let him try to take care of himself. He will make mistakes; and out of these mistakes will come his wisdom.'
- Henry Ward Beecher

'Perhaps we cannot prevent this world from being a world in which children are tortured. But we can reduce the number of tortured children.'
- Albert Camus

'When children sound silly, you will always find that it is in imitation of their elders.'
- Ernest Dimnet

'Respect the child. Be not too much his parent. Trespass not on his solitude.'
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

'To a father waxing old, nothing is dearer than a daughter. Sons have spirits of higher pitch, but less inclined to sweet, endearing fondness.'
- Euripides

'In praising or loving a child, we love and praise not that which is, but that which we hope for.'
- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

'Children generally hate to be idle. All the care then should be, that their busy humor should be constantly employed in something that is of use to them.'
- John Locke

'Children have more need of models than of critics.'
- Joseph Joubert

'Give me a child for the first seven years, and you may do what you like with him afterwards.'
- Anon

'I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.'
- Harry S. Truman

'I do not love him because he is good, but because he is my little child.'
- Rabindranath Tagore

'A child tells in the street what his father and mother say at home.'
- The Talmud

'A babe in a house is a well-spring of pleasure.'
- Martin Farquhar Tupper

May your days be merry and bright

I remember a carol that has this line 'May your days be merry and bright' and I smile. Not the kind of smile that comes from fond memories but one that actually comes from remembering some sad occurences.

On the 16th of this month, I lost a very dear friend. We practically grew up together. Same primary school, same secondary school and we were seat partners in class throughtout our junior days. It was a very bad blow. This christmas comes with a lil' shadow over it...

And my heart goes out to all, I remember one now - Gambo, who this season remind of their loss. May God, who alone can comfort the mourning and downcast, comfort our hearts and apply the balm that soothes all pain on our heart. I'm with you this period, accept my heartfelt sympathy.

The future will bring smiles to our faces and a new occurence that'll overshadow the past bitter one will come our way, Amen.

Once, not so long ago...

In five days, it'll be christmas again. This picture reminds me of santa and my visits to him in those days. It looks so long ago but really it isn't that long. Reminiscence...the yuletide season brings about many memories:
- of santa and his grotto
- of new clothes and the enthusiasm to wear them
- of gifts and the delight they brought
- of the food and drinks that came with the season
- of the beautiful green, red and gold colour combination
- of the sweet smell of harmattan
The list is endless but really, not so long ago, there was this eager look out for the yuletide, now, it's more of reflections. Anyone share this sentiment?